You know, since I started writing these review people have said a lot of things about me. I’m too critical (that’s my favorite), That I can’t simply enjoy something (…Battlefield Earth or Commando anyone?), That I just like to make fun of and hate on stuff (… your point?), most interestingly of all, I’m a masochist. That last one is mostly in response to the fact that I actually watch a lot of the movie that I really don’t have an interest in, and the fact that I called that attempted excursion into chick flicks masochism month didn’t help. Here’s the thing, if I just posted reviews for things that I watched and really really liked, it’d be 2 things 1: boring and one note. And 2: Self indulgent. Now, this already kind of is self indulgent being a blog of my opinion, but if I just review “Scott Pilgrim” every time, I’d not have any credibility if I have any already. The thing is, while I’m not paid to do this I do like to treat it like another job, and so it just feels more professional to actually do something insane like say pay money to go see “Nightmare on Elm Street” (2010). All that said, yeah, sometimes I actually do go see things specifically to marvel at incompetent filmmaking or make fun of something. Thus we come to “Skyline”, yet another movie to add to the very long history of alien invasion movies.
Those that don’t follow film criticism all that much, “Skyline” has been almost universally bashed on by pretty much everyone. It’s been called total shit, the worst movie ever, and so on. So I rented it, with a coupon, for free, because I really wanted to rip into something truly terrible after the snooze fest that was “Scream 4”. The result? I don’t understand, why is this supposed to be so terrible? I mean, don’t read too much into that, this is by no means good, but why is it supposed to be so terrible?
It’s your basic alien invader movie. It does all the same things done in movies like “Independence Day”, “War of The Worlds”, “Earth vs. The Flying Saucers” you get the idea. It’s centered around a bunch of people in a high rise apartment, hence the title, trying to survive as aliens invade and start abducting people en masse.
The performances are kind of meh, they aren’t really awful, not really stand out. Most of the characters are one note clichés from the other movies I listed and yeah, they can get annoying, but honestly I have seen WAY worse in other movies. The problem is that you don’t really care what happens to them no matter what, and the fact the that movie doesn’t get this means that when we end up spending too much time on the human characters. In theory this is fine and see the above list again for examples where this works, but really, with characters that are stock like this, it’s just a tad on the boring side.
You might say that makes for a bad movie, a lot of the time when I really dislike a movie I tend to find it just uninteresting and that’s why. But, “Skyline” is a different kind of monster, it’s boring, but it’s punctuated with some pretty ok special effects and really it kept my interest because I wanted to see what thing they wanted to do next. The editing was always tight and the photography was passable. The directors on this flick were the Strause Brothers, better known for being the guys that made the 2nd “Alien VS Predator” movie, and honestly, that one sucked but the action was better and the story at least a million times more interesting than the first one (remember though, one million times zero is still not a good number). These guys may not be the best story tellers, or the best directors for anything really, but they know how to use effects and that’s probably from they’re background as effect technicians and supervisors.
Basically, “Skyline”, like “Scream 4” is just kind of there. It’s not really worth your time, but it’s not going to give you a head ache or anything. It’s a movie with a premise that’s been done much better elsewhere and doesn’t really add anything to a genre that’s already more bloated than Jabba the Hutt. It’s bland, plain and simple. Skip it.
1.5… Aliens, I guess… out of 5
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
Saturday, April 30, 2011
Scream 4… or is it Scre4m?
So… Wes Craven is back already… That’s kind of a surprise. Those not in the know, back in 1996, Craven along with screen writer and man guilty of “Dawson’s Creek” Kevin Williamson made a little horror flick called “Scream”. What made “Scream” stand out was that it had a killer that would call his victims with questions about horror movies before trying to kill them, at the same time poking a little fun at the clichés and troupes that typified horror movies at the time, while kinda, sorta doing the exact same things. It was a cute little gimmick and otherwise, “Scream” was pretty solid as a movie if you ask me. It turned into a big hit and so almost immediately it got a sequel, which basically did the same thing, only this time pointing the self awareness on sequel clichés… again, basically while doing the same thing, and yeah, I still enjoyed it. The point I’m trying to make, is that “Scream” really only has one thing going for it, a cutesy kind of gimmick done with reasonable competent film making.
And so, the franchise has now made it to the fourth movie, and it’s gimmick’s charm has long since worn off. That aside, “Scream 4”(Scre4m?) does get a fairly easy ride as it has to be compared to “Scream 3”, which ranks just under slicing my finger with a table saw on the list of things I’d never like to experience again. It was stupid, boring, and oh so pointless with a crappy twist at the end and completely forgettable scare scenes. It was just crap, plain and simple.
But how is “Scream 4” (Scre4m?)? It’s… It exists. That’s really all I can say. This movie really doesn’t do much. The premise is that the main character of the series Sydney Prescott, played by Neve Campbell, has returned to her hometown of Woodsboro to promote her self-help book based on her experiences with the killers. However, surprise surprise, the murders start to happen again. This time, the gimmick’s theme is that of the Horror movie remakes that are all the rage, and so it’s assumed that the killers are remaking the first “movie” and it’s centered more around Campbell’s cousin and her circle of friends. The remake idea is nice in theory, but all it does is serve to pretty much dissolve most of the movie's tension because we basically know what's coming next and it's really more of a matter of who's going to die next.
The one thing I can always say for the “Scream” series, the acting is always pretty good to decent, and that is the case here. The cast all do the job, and most of the flaws or nit picks that I have with the performances come mostly from the blah at best dialogue. Most notable is oddly enough Anthony Anderson of “Transformers” and “Agent Cody Banks 2” fame, as well as Marley Shelton of “Grindhouse” and “Sin City”, as two of the cops in town. They’re quirky and fun and I honestly was more concerned about them while watching the movie.
The real problem with this movie is it has no staying power. I honestly walked out of the theater and basically forgot most of it. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not super short or anything, but none of the kills leave much of an impact, the twist at the end is silly and it really just seems to be in a hurry to try and finish. It feels rushed and I feel that if they had more time, maybe, they could have hammered out something a little more presentable. As it is, the movie barely makes it known that it existed. I mostly blame the script, Kevin Williamson has really just been rehashing the original movie since it came out, and aside from that silly show he created, nothing else has ever reached the same amount of popularity. Here it just feels like creative auto pilot and that if he has all the character talk a lot of movie trivia and non sense people will mistake it for characterization. Not to mention the reveal at the end just feels like it comes out of nowhere. I mean, yeah I found it shocking, but I honestly figured out half of it about 35 minutes into the movie and then the other half feels really really forced, even though they try and try to make it seem like it wasn't. Actually, the only thing that was memorable is a scene where the killer asking a question about a horror movie remake and a character lists of ALL of the horror remakes that have come out recently, and it takes up a full minute of screen time. Making the horror fan in me cry a little at the reminder.
Really, I’m just going to sum up like this, better than “Scream 3”, but not by much. It’s lame, forgettable and working with a gimmick that’s already long since gone past it’s expiration date.
1.5 stabbings out of 5.
And so, the franchise has now made it to the fourth movie, and it’s gimmick’s charm has long since worn off. That aside, “Scream 4”(Scre4m?) does get a fairly easy ride as it has to be compared to “Scream 3”, which ranks just under slicing my finger with a table saw on the list of things I’d never like to experience again. It was stupid, boring, and oh so pointless with a crappy twist at the end and completely forgettable scare scenes. It was just crap, plain and simple.
But how is “Scream 4” (Scre4m?)? It’s… It exists. That’s really all I can say. This movie really doesn’t do much. The premise is that the main character of the series Sydney Prescott, played by Neve Campbell, has returned to her hometown of Woodsboro to promote her self-help book based on her experiences with the killers. However, surprise surprise, the murders start to happen again. This time, the gimmick’s theme is that of the Horror movie remakes that are all the rage, and so it’s assumed that the killers are remaking the first “movie” and it’s centered more around Campbell’s cousin and her circle of friends. The remake idea is nice in theory, but all it does is serve to pretty much dissolve most of the movie's tension because we basically know what's coming next and it's really more of a matter of who's going to die next.
The one thing I can always say for the “Scream” series, the acting is always pretty good to decent, and that is the case here. The cast all do the job, and most of the flaws or nit picks that I have with the performances come mostly from the blah at best dialogue. Most notable is oddly enough Anthony Anderson of “Transformers” and “Agent Cody Banks 2” fame, as well as Marley Shelton of “Grindhouse” and “Sin City”, as two of the cops in town. They’re quirky and fun and I honestly was more concerned about them while watching the movie.
The real problem with this movie is it has no staying power. I honestly walked out of the theater and basically forgot most of it. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not super short or anything, but none of the kills leave much of an impact, the twist at the end is silly and it really just seems to be in a hurry to try and finish. It feels rushed and I feel that if they had more time, maybe, they could have hammered out something a little more presentable. As it is, the movie barely makes it known that it existed. I mostly blame the script, Kevin Williamson has really just been rehashing the original movie since it came out, and aside from that silly show he created, nothing else has ever reached the same amount of popularity. Here it just feels like creative auto pilot and that if he has all the character talk a lot of movie trivia and non sense people will mistake it for characterization. Not to mention the reveal at the end just feels like it comes out of nowhere. I mean, yeah I found it shocking, but I honestly figured out half of it about 35 minutes into the movie and then the other half feels really really forced, even though they try and try to make it seem like it wasn't. Actually, the only thing that was memorable is a scene where the killer asking a question about a horror movie remake and a character lists of ALL of the horror remakes that have come out recently, and it takes up a full minute of screen time. Making the horror fan in me cry a little at the reminder.
Really, I’m just going to sum up like this, better than “Scream 3”, but not by much. It’s lame, forgettable and working with a gimmick that’s already long since gone past it’s expiration date.
1.5 stabbings out of 5.
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
TRON Legacy
*SIGH* You know, as much as I love writing these reviews, there are sometimes where I just don’t want to. Example; the “Twilight” movies are the most aggravating movies out there to review. First of all, the movies have all sucked, but any reviewer that’s worth their salt knows that pointing out the flaws and problems with the films is hugely pointless because, well, the movies are going to make crap loads of money from the tween girls that make up the series’ fan base. Honestly, writing a review for something like that just feels like you’re the internet equivalent of that homeless guy that wears a sign saying the end is near. It’s a feeling I just couldn’t shake as I write this review, I know whatever my opinion may be, the people that were excited for “TRON Legacy” and love the movie already, won’t care what I have to say anyway. So if that’s the case I’m going to do what I always do and be brutally honest.
“TRON”, for those who don’t know, was a movie released by Disney back in 1982, it was one many films that year, like “Blade Runner” and John Carpenter’s remake of “The Thing” that didn’t really make a ton of money, but on video has had a very good life as a cult favorite. The premise is that a video game designer, Jeff Bridges, is zapped into a digital world called The Grid, and must take down a despotic program called master control. It had impressive visual effects for the time and, well, that’s really it.
First of all, I only saw the original “TRON” recently. I… I just don’t get it. I don’t see what’s so special about “TRON” outside the at the time amazing visuals, but the movie’s story is boring, the characters are all kind of lame and all in all I think it’s not really bad, but it’s really forgettable for me. And it’s not that I’m jaded by modern visual effects, I mean, one of my favorite movies is “Jason and the Argonauts”, who’s visuals almost more dated than “TRON”. The difference is that I liked all the characters, and the story, while really nothing special held my interest from beginning to end, and it’s basically the same story as “TRON” anyway, only “TRON” replaced the fantasy/mythology tropes with computer and video game jargon. I don’t know, maybe it has more to do with the movie coming out on the cusp on the video game age and it appeals to the fanasty of being warped into a video game, but part of me feels like that’s reading way too much into it.
The point is, due to its cult popularity and Hollywood being desperate for any franchise it hasn’t already remade, re-booted or re-imaged, “TRON Legacy” was born. A sequel set in modern times about Bridges’ character having disappeared several years after the events of the first movie. His son Sam, played by Garrett Hedlund, gets a strange message and winds up inside The Grid to find his father and avoid the program CLU, who has gone rogue and turned into a fascist dictator. So, what is my opinion? I mean, the original got by on at the time amazing visuals, and this movie is cutting edge, plus they’ve had nearly 30 years, that means they’ve taken time and actually thought of ways to deal with the issues that the original movie had, right?
Well, “TRON Legacy” does actually have a lot going for it. I can’t avoid it, I simply must say it, this movie has some of the sweetest eye candy ever. The visual style of the original is both homaged and updated and I feel it looks just awesome. Added to that, the action sequences are quite impressive and really ramp the excitement to 11 when they happen. Jeff Bridges reprises his role of Kevin Flynn, though I basically should say it’s more like he reprised his role as The Dude, if he had a computer sciences degree, which is great. Michael Sheen also has a great bit part where I swear he’s purely there to see if he could devour more scenery in a single scene than Al Pacnio has in his entire career.
But the real show stealer it has to be acknowledged, is the music. I’m going to just say it, Daft Punk got screwed by Oscar. This is, no contest, one of the most ambitious, impressive scores in recent history adding so much passion and excitement to the action scenes, as well as permeating the whole movie with a great atmosphere. Seriously, this soundtrack is awesome, buy it now if you haven’t already.
So, by all this logic this movie must be amazing, like I enjoyed it right? Well, yes and no. I liked the music and the action, it had a few characters that I liked. But oh my god, oh sweet Christmas this story is a total mess! If you try and follow this movies plot you will be left in the dust because the movie really didn’t care. It’s plot has more holes than swiss cheese, after a firing squad, not going to spoil them, but they all mostly boil down to the fact that this grid was designed by Flynn… and that’s all I’m going to say. On top of all the plot holes, there are some scenes early on where it feels like serious plot elements are being introduced, but they are never mentioned again. Part of me feels like this movie is being used to set up a franchise and those elements will be further explored in sequels, but that’s always a problem. Really what this movie boils down to is a retread of the first movie’s set pieces with a bigger budget and some additional characters and the workings for continuity among at least one more movie, and that causes the moments in between the action scenes to be really really dull, and really really stupid on top of it. I’ve been told I shouldn’t take something like this too seriously, but the movie really keeps trying to cling to this story. I can forgive movies that have lack story in favor of visuals, but there is a line and it gets crossed when the movie just seems to THINK it has a story when it barely exists. The problem gets to compound when pretty much all the characters other than the two I’ve already mentioned are enormously bland and clichéd. Early on those action scenes? Awesome, super cool, after awhile though, I got pretty bored. By the final chase I was just unimpressed because I frankly didn’t care who was going to win.
Overall, eh, I’m indifferent to “TRON Legacy”. I don’t hate it, but I really didn’t care for. It had some impressive visuals, awesome music and that’s really it. To me, that’s not quite enough to forgive an ungodly stupid plot and bland characters, but for some it is, and there’s nothing wrong with that.
2.5/5 digital gladiators
“TRON”, for those who don’t know, was a movie released by Disney back in 1982, it was one many films that year, like “Blade Runner” and John Carpenter’s remake of “The Thing” that didn’t really make a ton of money, but on video has had a very good life as a cult favorite. The premise is that a video game designer, Jeff Bridges, is zapped into a digital world called The Grid, and must take down a despotic program called master control. It had impressive visual effects for the time and, well, that’s really it.
First of all, I only saw the original “TRON” recently. I… I just don’t get it. I don’t see what’s so special about “TRON” outside the at the time amazing visuals, but the movie’s story is boring, the characters are all kind of lame and all in all I think it’s not really bad, but it’s really forgettable for me. And it’s not that I’m jaded by modern visual effects, I mean, one of my favorite movies is “Jason and the Argonauts”, who’s visuals almost more dated than “TRON”. The difference is that I liked all the characters, and the story, while really nothing special held my interest from beginning to end, and it’s basically the same story as “TRON” anyway, only “TRON” replaced the fantasy/mythology tropes with computer and video game jargon. I don’t know, maybe it has more to do with the movie coming out on the cusp on the video game age and it appeals to the fanasty of being warped into a video game, but part of me feels like that’s reading way too much into it.
The point is, due to its cult popularity and Hollywood being desperate for any franchise it hasn’t already remade, re-booted or re-imaged, “TRON Legacy” was born. A sequel set in modern times about Bridges’ character having disappeared several years after the events of the first movie. His son Sam, played by Garrett Hedlund, gets a strange message and winds up inside The Grid to find his father and avoid the program CLU, who has gone rogue and turned into a fascist dictator. So, what is my opinion? I mean, the original got by on at the time amazing visuals, and this movie is cutting edge, plus they’ve had nearly 30 years, that means they’ve taken time and actually thought of ways to deal with the issues that the original movie had, right?
Well, “TRON Legacy” does actually have a lot going for it. I can’t avoid it, I simply must say it, this movie has some of the sweetest eye candy ever. The visual style of the original is both homaged and updated and I feel it looks just awesome. Added to that, the action sequences are quite impressive and really ramp the excitement to 11 when they happen. Jeff Bridges reprises his role of Kevin Flynn, though I basically should say it’s more like he reprised his role as The Dude, if he had a computer sciences degree, which is great. Michael Sheen also has a great bit part where I swear he’s purely there to see if he could devour more scenery in a single scene than Al Pacnio has in his entire career.
But the real show stealer it has to be acknowledged, is the music. I’m going to just say it, Daft Punk got screwed by Oscar. This is, no contest, one of the most ambitious, impressive scores in recent history adding so much passion and excitement to the action scenes, as well as permeating the whole movie with a great atmosphere. Seriously, this soundtrack is awesome, buy it now if you haven’t already.
So, by all this logic this movie must be amazing, like I enjoyed it right? Well, yes and no. I liked the music and the action, it had a few characters that I liked. But oh my god, oh sweet Christmas this story is a total mess! If you try and follow this movies plot you will be left in the dust because the movie really didn’t care. It’s plot has more holes than swiss cheese, after a firing squad, not going to spoil them, but they all mostly boil down to the fact that this grid was designed by Flynn… and that’s all I’m going to say. On top of all the plot holes, there are some scenes early on where it feels like serious plot elements are being introduced, but they are never mentioned again. Part of me feels like this movie is being used to set up a franchise and those elements will be further explored in sequels, but that’s always a problem. Really what this movie boils down to is a retread of the first movie’s set pieces with a bigger budget and some additional characters and the workings for continuity among at least one more movie, and that causes the moments in between the action scenes to be really really dull, and really really stupid on top of it. I’ve been told I shouldn’t take something like this too seriously, but the movie really keeps trying to cling to this story. I can forgive movies that have lack story in favor of visuals, but there is a line and it gets crossed when the movie just seems to THINK it has a story when it barely exists. The problem gets to compound when pretty much all the characters other than the two I’ve already mentioned are enormously bland and clichéd. Early on those action scenes? Awesome, super cool, after awhile though, I got pretty bored. By the final chase I was just unimpressed because I frankly didn’t care who was going to win.
Overall, eh, I’m indifferent to “TRON Legacy”. I don’t hate it, but I really didn’t care for. It had some impressive visuals, awesome music and that’s really it. To me, that’s not quite enough to forgive an ungodly stupid plot and bland characters, but for some it is, and there’s nothing wrong with that.
2.5/5 digital gladiators
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Sucker Punch
It seems that I’m going to be that one voice that has to fight to stand out here. Many critics and movie goers have been pretty hard on director Zack Snyder. He’s made a total of five movies now, and it’s been enough for people to form the opinion that they really don’t like him that much. To be fair, doing a remake of one of the most beloved horror movies of all time, “Dawn Of The Dead”, was probably not the best way to debut. However, and this is someone that names the original as one of his all time favorite horror movies, the remake was pretty good. Ah, even as I type I can hear the rage of “Zombie’s can’t run!” and “The original was waaaaaaay better!”. And yes, that’s true, if I have to pick between the original or the remake, I’ll pick Romero. However, I still say that it is worth a look as an example of how to do a GOOD remake as it doesn’t feel like it needed to do anything other than have a similar idea, a bunch of people trapped in a mall while the zombie apocalypse is going on. He followed it with the enjoyable, if kind of stupid “300” and then the, I think, very well done adaptation of “Watchmen”. At the time of writing this I haven’t seen his animated effort “Legend of the Guardians: The Owls of Ga’ Hoole”, but I may endeavor to do so in the future. The point I’m trying to make is that I enjoy Synder’s work. He always makes an entertaining movie and I have to give the man a thumbs up for making movies that seem like they have actual effort behind them in this age of Michael Bays and Uwe Bolls.
This brings us to the topic of discussion today, his latest and first original work, “Sucker Punch”. The premise is that of a group of girls in a mental hospital that’s being run by a group of corrupt men and one of them is facing a lobotomy in five days. In order to deal with it, she creates an alternate reality in which she and all the other girls are trapped employees of a burlesque house/brothel in the 1920’s.
I have a hard time being objective in my review of this movie because for me, it does so many things very well as far as I’m concerned, but I’m also going to have to admit, that it really isn’t that original. It borrows elements from several movies, fairly blatantly. Most notably Terry Gilliam’s “Brazil” with the escape to fantasy to cope with reality, even the ending takes after Gilliam’s film a little. And most of the atmosphere and tone feels reminiscent of Dario Argento’s “Suspiria”, namely the implied child like nature of the girls, as well as some of the darker fairy tale type elements. I’m not saying this is a bad thing, but it does make me realize that a lot of people are going to be pretty unhappy with it.
Honestly, while I was aware and I’d most certainly prefer watching either of those again to “Sucker Punch” if I had to choose, I still enjoyed the movie. For as unoriginal as it was, for all the nit picks I could make, I have to confess, I was entertained. It’s the first action movie to come out in awhile that I actually had fun watching. The girls all perform well enough to get the job done, the script doesn’t really drag except for a little bit at the beginning, and I thought the action sequences were interesting.
That brings me to my next point. A lot of people do not like a lot of Zack Snyder’s style, most notably his use of slow motion. I’m the first to admit, yes, he can go over board and certainly does at certain points in “Sucker Punch”, but I would STILL take that over the shaky cam, choppy editing crap fests that Michael Bay likes to release on a regular basis. Mostly because, well, I can tell what the hell is going on. I’m honestly starting to think that action directors are really just resorting to the shaky cam tactic because they don’t want to use their brains and come up with a good action scene, which is a level of laziness that I cannot forgive. Added to the fact that I could actually see what was going on, I thought the effects are all pretty good and the fact that it was a bunch of attractive girls kicking all kinds of ass was certainly a fun thing to see.
Still for all the good the movie has, it does have some flaws, some of the villains go a little too over the top, like border line Saturday morning cartoon levels. At first I found it kind of funny, then it really started to get on my nerves. In fact, while the action scenes are the real attraction here, most of the scenes that take place in the brothel seem pretty half assed, in that way that they always are in action movies, purely existing to try and prove that they do want to try and connect the action scenes together in some fashion, and it goes about as coherently as you’d think. But I think most criminal of all, is the opening scene. I was fully prepared to completely hate this movie just from the opening. It’s pretentious, it’s slow (both literally and figuratively), and oh good god does it feel completely useless. The real narrative doesn’t start until it’s over, and all the background it gives on the main character would have been much better off just told as exposition or given as back story slowly through the film. However, once the movie actually gets going, I calmed down.
So overall, most of what I liked about “Sucker Punch” was just the fun of it. It was a action movie that tried to stand out a little, even if doing so showed that it was pretty much ripping off other movies. I would have called foul but then I got to see a bunch of girls in burlesque outfits pilot mech suits and use samurai swords to fight steam powered zombie Nazis… In my humble opinion this is at least fun enough to be enjoyable in that “Commando” part of the brain.
I give it 3 bad ass action chicks out of 5.
Worth a look in theaters, but not a definite must see.
This brings us to the topic of discussion today, his latest and first original work, “Sucker Punch”. The premise is that of a group of girls in a mental hospital that’s being run by a group of corrupt men and one of them is facing a lobotomy in five days. In order to deal with it, she creates an alternate reality in which she and all the other girls are trapped employees of a burlesque house/brothel in the 1920’s.
I have a hard time being objective in my review of this movie because for me, it does so many things very well as far as I’m concerned, but I’m also going to have to admit, that it really isn’t that original. It borrows elements from several movies, fairly blatantly. Most notably Terry Gilliam’s “Brazil” with the escape to fantasy to cope with reality, even the ending takes after Gilliam’s film a little. And most of the atmosphere and tone feels reminiscent of Dario Argento’s “Suspiria”, namely the implied child like nature of the girls, as well as some of the darker fairy tale type elements. I’m not saying this is a bad thing, but it does make me realize that a lot of people are going to be pretty unhappy with it.
Honestly, while I was aware and I’d most certainly prefer watching either of those again to “Sucker Punch” if I had to choose, I still enjoyed the movie. For as unoriginal as it was, for all the nit picks I could make, I have to confess, I was entertained. It’s the first action movie to come out in awhile that I actually had fun watching. The girls all perform well enough to get the job done, the script doesn’t really drag except for a little bit at the beginning, and I thought the action sequences were interesting.
That brings me to my next point. A lot of people do not like a lot of Zack Snyder’s style, most notably his use of slow motion. I’m the first to admit, yes, he can go over board and certainly does at certain points in “Sucker Punch”, but I would STILL take that over the shaky cam, choppy editing crap fests that Michael Bay likes to release on a regular basis. Mostly because, well, I can tell what the hell is going on. I’m honestly starting to think that action directors are really just resorting to the shaky cam tactic because they don’t want to use their brains and come up with a good action scene, which is a level of laziness that I cannot forgive. Added to the fact that I could actually see what was going on, I thought the effects are all pretty good and the fact that it was a bunch of attractive girls kicking all kinds of ass was certainly a fun thing to see.
Still for all the good the movie has, it does have some flaws, some of the villains go a little too over the top, like border line Saturday morning cartoon levels. At first I found it kind of funny, then it really started to get on my nerves. In fact, while the action scenes are the real attraction here, most of the scenes that take place in the brothel seem pretty half assed, in that way that they always are in action movies, purely existing to try and prove that they do want to try and connect the action scenes together in some fashion, and it goes about as coherently as you’d think. But I think most criminal of all, is the opening scene. I was fully prepared to completely hate this movie just from the opening. It’s pretentious, it’s slow (both literally and figuratively), and oh good god does it feel completely useless. The real narrative doesn’t start until it’s over, and all the background it gives on the main character would have been much better off just told as exposition or given as back story slowly through the film. However, once the movie actually gets going, I calmed down.
So overall, most of what I liked about “Sucker Punch” was just the fun of it. It was a action movie that tried to stand out a little, even if doing so showed that it was pretty much ripping off other movies. I would have called foul but then I got to see a bunch of girls in burlesque outfits pilot mech suits and use samurai swords to fight steam powered zombie Nazis… In my humble opinion this is at least fun enough to be enjoyable in that “Commando” part of the brain.
I give it 3 bad ass action chicks out of 5.
Worth a look in theaters, but not a definite must see.
Friday, March 11, 2011
My Soul to Take
Back in 1972, two young filmmakers got together and made a small budget Exploitation horror film called “The Last House on the Left”. It was a big hit for what it was, and is to this day one of the few films that still shocks and disturbs me each time I watch it. Those two filmmakers were Sean S. Cunningham, who later went on to create the “Friday the 13th” franchise, and Wes Craven. Craven is a director that is widely regarded as being one of the great master of the horror genre, creating such classics as “The Hills Have Eyes”, “Scream”, “The Serpent and the Rainbow”, and of course, the original “A Nightmare on Elm Street”. There is no denying that Craven is a very visionary director, and that he has a body of work with some very impressive titles in it. However, this is not to say that he’s perfect.
Lately, his work has been, well, underwhelming. “Cursed” was probably the worst that it got and every time people ask me about horror movies to avoid I tend to bring that one up. It was bland, silly, and a massive, massive let down. But, I put a little more of the blame on screenwriter Kevin Williamson, who seems to only know how to write things that he’s already done else where. Mostly just going back to his formula from the screenplay to “Scream”, notably the “twist” reveal at the end. “Red Eye” was next, and it was definitely a step in the right direction for Craven, but the movie was still pretty weak and ultimately very forgettable.
So as you can imagine, there is a lot of pressure on his latest film “My Soul to Take”, the first film that he himself has both written and directed since “Wes Craven’s New Nightmare”, which you really should see if you haven’t already. And the result? Well, again, it’s pretty much a let down.
But I’m sure a lot of you are wondering: “Is it as bad as the ‘Nightmare’ remake?” Well, no, but it’s not much better. Where as the 2010 version of “A Nightmare on Elm Street” was just a very badly made horror movie that makes no effort to establish dream sequences, or tone, or well, anything other than jump scares, “My Soul to Take” at least tries to do something other than go “BOO!!!” every five minutes. But that doesn’t instantly make it good.
The plot is that a serial killer dies one night, and at the same moment of his death, there are seven babies born. 16 years later, the seven children start becoming the targets of a killer, leaving the town to wonder if the killer is truly dead, or if there is something more sinister a foot. It’s an interesting premise, but basically it just boils down to being yet another run of the mill slasher movie. That’s pretty much all I can say, the supernatural elements aren’t really downplayed or anything, but they really aren’t used all that much. The deaths are all pretty stock, but at the same time have a little more creativity than… that OTHER movie that shall no longer be named, but otherwise there isn’t much to this.
The script is rather weak. It has a lot of characters, all of them are pretty much stereotypes. The jock, the awkward nerd, the religious one, the bitch, the borderline mentally unhinged guy, the clique leader, the skeptical cop etc. and again, the performances reflect these parts, however unlike, that OTHER movie, here the performances are all at least competent. Yes, the characters are all one note, but they are at least decently acted one note characters. Most of the time in the movie building up this whole who is the killer idea, yet again calling back to “Scream”, again. It’s really the movie’s biggest problem, it’s just a bland script from an ok idea, and it makes the movie so boring.
It’s really upsetting because the photography is great, the editing is really well done, it has a nice atmosphere and tone, and it really seems to want to work, but it really just can’t because this script doesn’t seem that well thought out. There are moments where it feels like the movie finally wants to get going and go balls to the wall as a real slasher, but then it will just stop to have scenes that are, I guess supposed to be developing the characters, but then they are killed two scenes later and so it just makes things redundant and predictable.
I love Wes Craven’s work, but this movie was so disappointing. It was not well written and no amount of ok-ish acting, nice photography, or good editing can change that. I hope that someday that he’ll make another horror film, or another movie in any genre that attest to the talent he clearly has. And I can tell you right now, the up coming “Scream 4” is not going to be it.
Lately, his work has been, well, underwhelming. “Cursed” was probably the worst that it got and every time people ask me about horror movies to avoid I tend to bring that one up. It was bland, silly, and a massive, massive let down. But, I put a little more of the blame on screenwriter Kevin Williamson, who seems to only know how to write things that he’s already done else where. Mostly just going back to his formula from the screenplay to “Scream”, notably the “twist” reveal at the end. “Red Eye” was next, and it was definitely a step in the right direction for Craven, but the movie was still pretty weak and ultimately very forgettable.
So as you can imagine, there is a lot of pressure on his latest film “My Soul to Take”, the first film that he himself has both written and directed since “Wes Craven’s New Nightmare”, which you really should see if you haven’t already. And the result? Well, again, it’s pretty much a let down.
But I’m sure a lot of you are wondering: “Is it as bad as the ‘Nightmare’ remake?” Well, no, but it’s not much better. Where as the 2010 version of “A Nightmare on Elm Street” was just a very badly made horror movie that makes no effort to establish dream sequences, or tone, or well, anything other than jump scares, “My Soul to Take” at least tries to do something other than go “BOO!!!” every five minutes. But that doesn’t instantly make it good.
The plot is that a serial killer dies one night, and at the same moment of his death, there are seven babies born. 16 years later, the seven children start becoming the targets of a killer, leaving the town to wonder if the killer is truly dead, or if there is something more sinister a foot. It’s an interesting premise, but basically it just boils down to being yet another run of the mill slasher movie. That’s pretty much all I can say, the supernatural elements aren’t really downplayed or anything, but they really aren’t used all that much. The deaths are all pretty stock, but at the same time have a little more creativity than… that OTHER movie that shall no longer be named, but otherwise there isn’t much to this.
The script is rather weak. It has a lot of characters, all of them are pretty much stereotypes. The jock, the awkward nerd, the religious one, the bitch, the borderline mentally unhinged guy, the clique leader, the skeptical cop etc. and again, the performances reflect these parts, however unlike, that OTHER movie, here the performances are all at least competent. Yes, the characters are all one note, but they are at least decently acted one note characters. Most of the time in the movie building up this whole who is the killer idea, yet again calling back to “Scream”, again. It’s really the movie’s biggest problem, it’s just a bland script from an ok idea, and it makes the movie so boring.
It’s really upsetting because the photography is great, the editing is really well done, it has a nice atmosphere and tone, and it really seems to want to work, but it really just can’t because this script doesn’t seem that well thought out. There are moments where it feels like the movie finally wants to get going and go balls to the wall as a real slasher, but then it will just stop to have scenes that are, I guess supposed to be developing the characters, but then they are killed two scenes later and so it just makes things redundant and predictable.
I love Wes Craven’s work, but this movie was so disappointing. It was not well written and no amount of ok-ish acting, nice photography, or good editing can change that. I hope that someday that he’ll make another horror film, or another movie in any genre that attest to the talent he clearly has. And I can tell you right now, the up coming “Scream 4” is not going to be it.
Saturday, February 26, 2011
Oscars 2011
Yes. This is my time of the year. The Annual Academy Awards ceremony is something that I look forward to with lots of enthusiasm every year. I couldn’t give a crap about the Super Bowl, but I live for the Oscars. It’s the one time of the year where all this knowledge of movies I’ve built up actually seems to matter to the rest of the people out there. So, what I’m going to is run down the major categories acting, directing, writing and of course, Best Picture. I’ll make my predictions and then at the end give a brief once over of all 10 best picture nominees and introduce my new rating system. So here it goes.
Best Supporting Actor
So this is one that will probably be pretty damn easy. My pick is going to be Christian Bale for “The Fighter”. He is so energetic that he practically steals the movie from lead Mark Wahlberg, and that’s the whole point of the movie, that Wahlberg’s Mickey is supposed to be over shadowed by Bale’s Dickey in the film. That and Bale is one of those people that’s a really damn good actor with an already impressive body of work and this is to date his best performance.
Best Supporting Actress
A little trickier, and took a lot of thought, but it’s probably going to be Helena Bonham Carter for “The King’s Speech”. The rest of the nominees are all very good and did great in their respective roles and my personal favorite was Amy Adams in “The Fighter” but from a stand point of what will actually win, Carter was in the big awards magnet and she was fantastic, and it’s a safe bet she’ll be the one to win.
Best Actor
Colin Firth for “The King’s Speech”. I don’t need to explain this. If you’ve seen the movie you’d know this already, the whole point of the film is this one role and Firth was just great in it. The majority of the performance isn’t even his lines, or delivery, it’s all in his face and expressions. Everyone else nominated has either won, or will get another shot soon, Firth has been nominated before and really should win.
Best Actress
I’m going to stick my neck out. Everyone is talking about Natalie Portman for “Black Swan”, and I would love to see that movie win one of the big boys this year, but I’m pretty confident that due to political motivation as well as penance for past over sights, Annette Bening will win for “The Kids are All Right”. Being has be up before three times, lost twice to the same person, and is well loved by Hollywood. What it really boils down to is, while this definitely was one of Portman’s best performances, Bening has been snubbed numerous times before and really has this one coming.
Best Adapted Screenplay
Aaron Sorkin for “The Social Network”. It’s kind of hard to argue that one of the best movies of the year, was simply put, about the founding of Facebook. The only way this could work is if you had two things solid, first being really good actors and seond they need to be working off a really good script. It’s the most talked about script of the year, it’s brilliant and it will most likely win.
Best Original Screenplay
Instantly I want to say “The King’s Speech” here, but really I have a gut feeling that this is going to go to “The Kids Are All Right”. Think about it. Most of the time in the last few years the movies with the overly dry humor and the unconventional set ups tend to be the ones that get this and that’s basically what “The Kid’s Are All Right” is. I know you may want to put any money on “King’s Speech” and it is still a heavy contender, but I’m putting mine on “The Kids Are All Right”.
Best Director
I’m just sure this is going to go to David Fincher for “The Social Network”. Fincher is one of the most respected filmmakers to come out of the 90’s, he’s long overdue for some awards recognition. I don’t even think there’s going to be any issue. David Fincher, “The Social Network”.
Best Picture
Okay, I have seen ALL the 10 movies up for the big prize. And honestly, they are all pretty damn good. I have issues with some of them but overall I enjoyed all these movies. So, before I name my prediction for Best Picture, let me go through and give a brief overview of each movie and an out of 5 rating for each.
The Kids Are All Right. This, is my least favorite nominee. I don’t really understand all the praise. It’s not doing anything different other than the whole angle of gay domestic partners raising a family, which has some nice moments in the movie, but basic all it ends up boiling down to yet another movie pointing out how families aren’t perfect and yeah, maybe that’s the point but I’m really just so sick of them that I may be acting a bit unfair. But honestly I just don’t see why I should find this movie so special other than the whole thing about the gay parents, I’m sorry, but I’m just not a fan of this genre because it’s over done. Not saying it was pure terrible, just that in general, I don’t really like this kind of movie. Not because I want to follow some Norman Rockwell ideal or whatever. But that I just don’t care for how predictable it gets and how overly dry the humor got. 3 out of 5
Winter’s Bone: Winner of the Grand Jury Prize and last year’s Sundance festival, this is just a well done mystery story. I love this movie’s well executed mood and its subtle build of suspense. It almost completely makes you ignore the fact that the character is basically going form scene to scene getting the “Our princess is in aonther castle screen” from Super Mario Bros.. But at the same time, that’s the point. It’s all about her frustration of finding her father and each time she finds road block after road block you feel it too. I really feel while it can suffer from repetition, it’s still a really good movie. 3.5 out of 5.
Inception: Great premise, well executed with great performances and amazing effects. All in all I loved this movie, as you probably already know from it’s placement on my top movies of 2010 and it was most certainly one of the best movies made this year past year. 4 out of 5.
The King’s Speech: Good movie. It’s a solid, well made period piece with a good script, great performances and a great all around feel good piece. What holds it back for me, is, well I see movies like this all the time and after really looking back, while this is a great example of how to do this kind of movie right, it still boils down to the fact that it’s a typical period piece. It’s a really good one, but overall I just feel it could have been more, but I’m pleasantly pleased with what I have. 4 out of 5.
Toy Story 3: Will win best animated film Certainly a great example of how animation shouldn’t just be treated as kid stuff and a damn fine movie to boot. Great jokes, poignant story and well round characters. 4.5 out of 5.
Black Swan: Best psychological thriller in years. Haunting photography, epic score, and a well rounded movie. Portman owns the movie, but doesn’t actually take it all away from the cast. Everyone gets to shine and all round this movie just rocks. 4.5 out of 5.
127 Hours: This movie works purely for James Franco’s heart breaking performance. This movie was one of the hardest I’ve had to watch in awhile and I mean that as the highest compliment, I don’t want to say more for fear of spoiling the movie, other than if you haven’t seen it, you really owe it to yourself. 4.5 out of 5.
True Grit: The Coens do it again. A well done western with great characters and a gripping fast paced story, brilliant photography and an all round great time at the movie. The Duke would be pleased, I’m sure. 4.5 out of 5.
The Fighter: I know what you’re probably thinking Really? Another movie about a guy from humble backgrounds that has a chance at a title shot and his trials in getting there? Do we really need another r one of these when we already have “Rocky” and “Raging Bull”?.... YES!!! This movie is well made. Borderline documentary style story about two brothers, one a has been, one an up and comer, and how their bond is tested by crack addiction, the call of fame, and the ties of family. Seriously, no other sports movie has been this compelling in a long time. 4.5 out of 5.
The Social Network: MY favorite of the nominees. It’s a movie that takes such a simple premise and does such a great job with it. I’ve already talked this movie to death but all I can say is, WOW! 5 out of 5.
But what will win? Well, while all the nominees this year I can honestly say are solid and wo0rth checking out, the race really only boils down to two movies. “The Social Network” and “The King’s Speech”. I’m not pointing out anything you don’t already know, and I’m pretty much certain that, while I really will be rooting for “The Social Network”, “The King’s Speech” is probably going to win. It’s basically going to boil down to the feel good movie winning out over the thinking person movie. Oh well, at least when it came to awards time this year we didn’t have crap like “The Blind Side” this time. See ya next time folks!
Best Supporting Actor
So this is one that will probably be pretty damn easy. My pick is going to be Christian Bale for “The Fighter”. He is so energetic that he practically steals the movie from lead Mark Wahlberg, and that’s the whole point of the movie, that Wahlberg’s Mickey is supposed to be over shadowed by Bale’s Dickey in the film. That and Bale is one of those people that’s a really damn good actor with an already impressive body of work and this is to date his best performance.
Best Supporting Actress
A little trickier, and took a lot of thought, but it’s probably going to be Helena Bonham Carter for “The King’s Speech”. The rest of the nominees are all very good and did great in their respective roles and my personal favorite was Amy Adams in “The Fighter” but from a stand point of what will actually win, Carter was in the big awards magnet and she was fantastic, and it’s a safe bet she’ll be the one to win.
Best Actor
Colin Firth for “The King’s Speech”. I don’t need to explain this. If you’ve seen the movie you’d know this already, the whole point of the film is this one role and Firth was just great in it. The majority of the performance isn’t even his lines, or delivery, it’s all in his face and expressions. Everyone else nominated has either won, or will get another shot soon, Firth has been nominated before and really should win.
Best Actress
I’m going to stick my neck out. Everyone is talking about Natalie Portman for “Black Swan”, and I would love to see that movie win one of the big boys this year, but I’m pretty confident that due to political motivation as well as penance for past over sights, Annette Bening will win for “The Kids are All Right”. Being has be up before three times, lost twice to the same person, and is well loved by Hollywood. What it really boils down to is, while this definitely was one of Portman’s best performances, Bening has been snubbed numerous times before and really has this one coming.
Best Adapted Screenplay
Aaron Sorkin for “The Social Network”. It’s kind of hard to argue that one of the best movies of the year, was simply put, about the founding of Facebook. The only way this could work is if you had two things solid, first being really good actors and seond they need to be working off a really good script. It’s the most talked about script of the year, it’s brilliant and it will most likely win.
Best Original Screenplay
Instantly I want to say “The King’s Speech” here, but really I have a gut feeling that this is going to go to “The Kids Are All Right”. Think about it. Most of the time in the last few years the movies with the overly dry humor and the unconventional set ups tend to be the ones that get this and that’s basically what “The Kid’s Are All Right” is. I know you may want to put any money on “King’s Speech” and it is still a heavy contender, but I’m putting mine on “The Kids Are All Right”.
Best Director
I’m just sure this is going to go to David Fincher for “The Social Network”. Fincher is one of the most respected filmmakers to come out of the 90’s, he’s long overdue for some awards recognition. I don’t even think there’s going to be any issue. David Fincher, “The Social Network”.
Best Picture
Okay, I have seen ALL the 10 movies up for the big prize. And honestly, they are all pretty damn good. I have issues with some of them but overall I enjoyed all these movies. So, before I name my prediction for Best Picture, let me go through and give a brief overview of each movie and an out of 5 rating for each.
The Kids Are All Right. This, is my least favorite nominee. I don’t really understand all the praise. It’s not doing anything different other than the whole angle of gay domestic partners raising a family, which has some nice moments in the movie, but basic all it ends up boiling down to yet another movie pointing out how families aren’t perfect and yeah, maybe that’s the point but I’m really just so sick of them that I may be acting a bit unfair. But honestly I just don’t see why I should find this movie so special other than the whole thing about the gay parents, I’m sorry, but I’m just not a fan of this genre because it’s over done. Not saying it was pure terrible, just that in general, I don’t really like this kind of movie. Not because I want to follow some Norman Rockwell ideal or whatever. But that I just don’t care for how predictable it gets and how overly dry the humor got. 3 out of 5
Winter’s Bone: Winner of the Grand Jury Prize and last year’s Sundance festival, this is just a well done mystery story. I love this movie’s well executed mood and its subtle build of suspense. It almost completely makes you ignore the fact that the character is basically going form scene to scene getting the “Our princess is in aonther castle screen” from Super Mario Bros.. But at the same time, that’s the point. It’s all about her frustration of finding her father and each time she finds road block after road block you feel it too. I really feel while it can suffer from repetition, it’s still a really good movie. 3.5 out of 5.
Inception: Great premise, well executed with great performances and amazing effects. All in all I loved this movie, as you probably already know from it’s placement on my top movies of 2010 and it was most certainly one of the best movies made this year past year. 4 out of 5.
The King’s Speech: Good movie. It’s a solid, well made period piece with a good script, great performances and a great all around feel good piece. What holds it back for me, is, well I see movies like this all the time and after really looking back, while this is a great example of how to do this kind of movie right, it still boils down to the fact that it’s a typical period piece. It’s a really good one, but overall I just feel it could have been more, but I’m pleasantly pleased with what I have. 4 out of 5.
Toy Story 3: Will win best animated film Certainly a great example of how animation shouldn’t just be treated as kid stuff and a damn fine movie to boot. Great jokes, poignant story and well round characters. 4.5 out of 5.
Black Swan: Best psychological thriller in years. Haunting photography, epic score, and a well rounded movie. Portman owns the movie, but doesn’t actually take it all away from the cast. Everyone gets to shine and all round this movie just rocks. 4.5 out of 5.
127 Hours: This movie works purely for James Franco’s heart breaking performance. This movie was one of the hardest I’ve had to watch in awhile and I mean that as the highest compliment, I don’t want to say more for fear of spoiling the movie, other than if you haven’t seen it, you really owe it to yourself. 4.5 out of 5.
True Grit: The Coens do it again. A well done western with great characters and a gripping fast paced story, brilliant photography and an all round great time at the movie. The Duke would be pleased, I’m sure. 4.5 out of 5.
The Fighter: I know what you’re probably thinking Really? Another movie about a guy from humble backgrounds that has a chance at a title shot and his trials in getting there? Do we really need another r one of these when we already have “Rocky” and “Raging Bull”?.... YES!!! This movie is well made. Borderline documentary style story about two brothers, one a has been, one an up and comer, and how their bond is tested by crack addiction, the call of fame, and the ties of family. Seriously, no other sports movie has been this compelling in a long time. 4.5 out of 5.
The Social Network: MY favorite of the nominees. It’s a movie that takes such a simple premise and does such a great job with it. I’ve already talked this movie to death but all I can say is, WOW! 5 out of 5.
But what will win? Well, while all the nominees this year I can honestly say are solid and wo0rth checking out, the race really only boils down to two movies. “The Social Network” and “The King’s Speech”. I’m not pointing out anything you don’t already know, and I’m pretty much certain that, while I really will be rooting for “The Social Network”, “The King’s Speech” is probably going to win. It’s basically going to boil down to the feel good movie winning out over the thinking person movie. Oh well, at least when it came to awards time this year we didn’t have crap like “The Blind Side” this time. See ya next time folks!
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
The Lunatic's top 10 Guilty Pleasures
Well, once again Valentine’s Day has come and gone. Wither you see it as a hypocritical holiday that tries to force romance on the public and cause single people to drink heavily, or if you genuinely feel that it is a wonderful day where couples can have some quality time together using the given holiday as an excuse for a special occasion, it’s hard to deny that this particular time of the year has to do with romance and well, that big “L” word Love. And you probably think that I’m going to do the typical thing and use today to reference those movies that have the best love stories ever or something like that. But honestly, after all the horrible, HORRIBLE chick flicks I watched for that little two week event last summer as well as subjecting myself to the bafflingly popular “Twilight Saga”, I kind of hate romance films right now. You can call me an a-hole or a dorky loveless cynic or whatever you want, but today, I’m going to talk about something far more interesting and worth while than making a list that will just end with the top two spots going to “Casablanca” and “Gone With The Wind” like everyone knows will be the case anyway. I’m going to talk about movies that I love. No, this isn’t my favorite movies list or anything. Far from it, this is rather the movies that I love to watch, but I honestly shouldn’t, I actually feel wrong for doing so in some cases. Be it because they are poorly shot, terribly written or horribly acted. This is my top 10 movies I shouldn’t like but do, or my Guiltiest Guilty pleasures for short.
10. Roger Corman Movies.
I’m kind of cheating with this one. Anyone that is a big enough movie fan or just a big fan of cheesy B movies, has at least heard of Roger Corman. Corman is a director and producer that is famous for two big things: 1. Without him, people like Martin Scorsese, Joe Dante, and James Cameron would probably not have jobs right now, and 2. Being notoriously cheap and producing as many movies as he can, sometimes within a single production. Corman has famously done things like shoot 3 or 4 movies on a single set at the same time, re-cycle props and costumes, and even shoot ENTIRE MOVIES IN A DAY! (allegedly) And the results, well, they can be down right idiotic or oddly good. But they are always, ALWAYS entertaining. Hell, one of his most famous movies, “The Little Shop Of Horrors” has been turned into a Broadway Musical and then THAT was adapted into a movie Musical starring Steve Martin and Rick Moranis! I can’t really pin point one movie that he’s specifically directed or produced that I feel could just represent the whole spectrum of his work, so I’m lumping them all together and will just list off some that I feel are especially memorable.
- Humanoids From The Deep
- The Edgar Allen Poe Adaptations starring Vincent Price.
- A Bucket of Blood
- Piranha (1979)
And
- It Conquered The World
Check these flicks out and enjoy!
9. Commando
Ok, this one probably isn’t much of a surprise seeing as how I have an already confessed fondness for the occasional big dumb action movie, it’s why I had “Machete” on my list of the five most enjoyable movies of 2010. But if I had to pick a favorite, it’d have to be “Commando”. Why isn’t this higher on the list then? It’s pretty much everyone’s favorite big dumb action movie. Schwarzeneggar has never had much in the way of acting chops, but that’s part of his charm if you ask me. No one delivers one liners better than Ah-nuld and in certain roles like the Terminator movies, his stilted delivery actually works really well for the character. But anyway “Commando”, if you have to ask me why I like the movie, you clearly haven’t seen it. The action is absolutely silly and over the top, the premise is paper thin and un-godly stupid, and the one liners are just pure gold. My personal favorite? “Remembah Sully when I said I’d kill you last?… I lied.” This is silly 80’s action schlock at its absolute finest. I have no problems saying that it is impossible for this movie not to bring some enjoyment. If you haven’t seen it yet, invite your friends over, grab some beer and pop corn and have a good time.
8. The Tingler
William Castle’s career really makes me hate modern movie marketing. It’s all straight forward about being a movie and that you should see it for excess CGI (Clash of the Titans 2010) or these two big name, gorgeous actors are in a movie together for the first time (The Tourist). No, William Castle was awesome. And I’m so sad that his style of publicity for movies stopped before my time. Like Roger Corman, he would release mostly B movie schlock like “House on Haunted Hill” and things of that ilk. However, Castle made a huge spectacle of these movies, creating marketing gimmicks that just made the movie going public have to go see them. Things like insisting audiences sign liability wavers saying they wouldn’t sue the theaters or studio due to the harshly terrifying nature of the movie, when in reality it was mostly silly and had effects only slightly better than the average Ed Wood movie. But the best gimmick had to be what he came up with for “The Tingler”, a Vincent Price vehicle that is about, and this is seriously the plot, a parasite that lives in your spine and feeds on your fear, causing a “tingling” sensation and can only be defeated by screaming to release all the feelings of fear and stop the nourishment of the creature. That premise is so freaking silly and yet so genius in its ridiculousness that it is completely awesome. Price really works to sell it as something serious, and honestly if he can’t that no one can, but for me the crowning moment of the movie is a scene where one Tingler that they have removed from a dead body, gets loose in a theater and the film cuts out with Vincent Price’s voice demanding that the audience “SCREAM! SCREAM FOR YOUR LIFE!”. When released in theaters, Castle had certain theaters install seats that would vibrate when this part occurred in the movie, hopefully causing the occupant to be caught off guard and let out a shriek that would cause the whole theater to scream. That, that is just plain awesome. However, since this can’t exactly be replicated at home on video, the scene is just left in as is… and it’s hilarious. This movie is just a great time and cheesy as a plate of nachos, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
7. Godzilla: Final Wars.
Yeah, I love Godzilla. I almost don’t want to call this a guilty pleasure, I feel that most of the films in the long running Japanese franchise are actually pretty damn good. Buuut most of the time I bring up my love of these films, some one always points out how silly they are, or how formulaic they get, and of course, how it’s a guy in a suit and that’s just stupid. Well you know what? I. Do. Not. CARE! I love my cheesy Japanese monster movies and I love them best when they feature guys in costumes beating the crap out of each other! The whole point is that you sit back and just accept them for what they are, fun. And hell, in the Heisei series (aka the run of the films from “Godzilla 1985” to “Godzilla Vs. Destoroyah”) the effects hold up really well and I would even say look better than more than half of the putrid CGI abominations that get released today. Plus, when you suspend your disbelief, these movies are far far more entertaining than the total crap Michael Bay releases on a regular basis. Hell, the first one is seen as a full on classic by many respected film critics. So again, I love my giant radioactive lizard that routinely destroys Tokyo while fighting other giant monsters, and if there was one movie they made with the big guy that I just adored for the sheer fun of it, it would have to be “Godzilla: Final Wars”, to date the last film in the Godzilla franchise. This movie is just awesome. It has: Giant monster battles. Kung Fu fighting. Car chases. Space ship fights. Aliens pretending to be humans. Tons of city destruction. Dark humor. Silly humor, and of course… Godzilla taking on more monsters than I’ve ever seen in a single movie. Yes, it is silly. Yes, it is cheesy. And yes, I don’t care what you think of me. I say we need more movies with guys in monster costumes fighting each other.
6. Yor: Hunter From The Future
Ok, I’ll be honest. I had never even heard of this movie until about a year ago when I saw a video review of it. It looked silly and I figured it’d be worth a laugh. Oh man was I right. Trying to describe this movie is nearly impossible, ok that’s not quite true. It’s a basic Conan knock off with some poorly designed Dinosaurs, ridiculous make up, and by far some of the most over the top performances ever. But in some weird way, this movie just works. It’s fun. I especially love the last third of the movie where Yor and friends go to the mysterious island populated by robots and a cliché bad guy called the Overlord. This guy’s dialogue is pure gold and super fun to imitate. It’s also of note for being one of the first starring roles for B list action hero Reb Brown. I can’t explain why but there is something that makes this movie just bad enough that it’s cheesy and silly in a good way. From the moment the silly theme song starts, to the moment it sends us out with the end credits, this movie is just pure fun. I’m a little bothered this movie hasn’t had a DVD release in the states yet, but if you look really hard, you can find a VHS copy like I did. I own this movie and always love watching it when I’m in that mood for something epic in that special kind of way.
5. Tales From The Crypt: Demon Knight
Here’s where things are going to get embarrassing. While I still defend my love of these movies, they are the ones that I know I probably shouldn’t like nearly as much as I do. This of course wasn’t the first time the Tales from the Crypt franchise went to the movies, (I may save those for a later day.) This was the first time that the modern TV show took it’s style to the big screen. How did they choose to do it? With a horror anthology? Ummm…. No, they went with an “Army Of Darkness” rip off. However I will confess that this movie always makes me laugh but feel guilty at the same time. Why’s that? Well, I like it for one big reason, it’s insanely immature, a criticism I’ve held against many other movies I’ve reviewed most notably “Gamer”. So yes, liking this makes me feel a little hypocritical, but in my defense, this is a movie that doesn’t really try and present itself as something other than aggressively juvenile and I love it for that. The problem I have with things like “Gamer” is well, it feels stupid to try and have a movie that is trying, I guess, to be taken seriously, and then turn around and show boobs for the sake of being able to. This movie, it feels like the excess is part of the fun. Hell, to be honest, I enjoyed the “Crank” movies for the same reason and they had the same creative team as “Gamer”. This movie is just fun. Peoples’ heads get punched through, there are gratuitous bare breasts, insanely over the top gore, corny puns and of course the Crypt keeper making bad jokes at the front and end of the movie. Not even touching the absolutely awesome turn Billy Zane takes as the lead demon. Really I just always have a great time with this movie and know that I shouldn’t, but all the same, it’s earned it’s rightful place on my DVD shelf.
4. Resident Evil: Apocalypse
I’ve said before that I like the first two Resident Evil movies, but I dislike the last two. I gave a little bit of a reason when I talked about “Afterlife” but I’ll elaborate a little further. I love the fact that these first two movies are insanely bad. No really, I never played the games or anything, I like these movies because they are stupid mindless fun and I have a great time making fun of them while watching them MST3K style. The problem I have with “Extinction” and “Afterlife” is that they are really, really boring. “Extinction” is a movie that seems to be trying to ape “Day of the Dead” and “The Road Warrior” at the same time, to a resoundingly uninteresting effect. And “afterlife” is a gimmicky piece of crap that tries to stretch at best 30 or so minutes of plot over an hour and half. The first two though, oh boy, these are some of the most interestingly bad things I’ve ever seen. I actually went to see this one twice opening weekend because I just had a great time laughing at it. It’s so stupid and wants to present itself as a serious adaptation of the video games from what I’ve seen, and I just can’t stop laughing at it. The performances are just terrible, but the action is interesting. The monsters are laughable, and made even more so by the fact people are trying to take it seriously in the movie. I honestly can’t really understand why people have such a problem with this one, aside from being a poor adaptation of the video game it’s based on. I don’t feel it’s all that bad if you just want a fun movie, but I’m quite the minority here so it makes number four purely because I seem to be one of the only people that likes it in any fashion.
3. Freddy versus Jason
Yeah, I don’t think I need to explain why I feel guilty about this one. But to be honest, I really don’t think this is that bad. In general movies that have matched up two completely different franchises have, well, sucked. You only need to look at “AVP” to know that. This one, I didn’t think was that bad. I watched it during a phase where I had seen all the “Nightmare on Elm Street” movies and had just finished slogging through the “Friday the 13th” movies. So naturally I figured I may as well sit down for the team up and I fully expected to hate it. Before you ask, I’ll take Freddy over Jason. Sorry to those fans of Mr. Voorhees, but I honestly don’t like him or his movies all that much. So yeah, I was rooting for Freddy the whole time. Yeah, the movie has a cop out ending, which is unfortunate, but I rather like how creative they got with the plot to bring these two together, and the fight scenes with the two of them are just great. The movie seems to know that it’s not supposed to be a serious horror film and I respect it for that. It’s a fun ride with great jokes, awesome kill scenes and a hook to ensure you’ll watch it from beginning to end.
2. The Rock
*Sigh* Yes. Yes, I know. I know how this looks. I am truly sorry for doing this, but I promised I’d be honest here. *Gulp* There is in fact ONE and only ONE Michael Bay movie that I like, “The Rock” starring Nicolas Cage and Sean Connery. And that’s actually why I like the movie right there: Nicolas Cage and Sean Connery, trying to one up each other in a silly action movie. It’s just golden. Everything else about the movie sucks. The story is stock action fodder, the actions scene are, eh, I guess competent seeing as this was before Bay really liked his shaky camera stuff we’ve sooooooo loved from the “Transformers” movies. In fact, if you had two other actors in these roles, I would say this movie was totally worthless. But it’s saved by Connery playing the gruff aging bad ass and Nic Cage playing a quirky scientist. They have the funniest acting exchanges I’ve seen in a movie and when I try and look back at what’s memorable about this movie, it is things like Cage doing weird face ticks and holding a gun shakily, or Connery saying: “Your best? Losers always whine about their best. Winners get to go home and fuck the prom queen.” I just can’t help it. Dumb crap like that makes me laugh and I think that it saves an otherwise terrible movie just by giving it that massive amount of entertainment value, intentional are not. This movie is here at number 2 because it’s a movie I admit I can’t fully hate, from a director I despise on every level.
So you’re probably asking. What could possibly make you feel more guilty than admitting to liking Michael Bay? How could you possibly top that? What could possibly be worse?
Well, since you asked… Here it goes.
1. Battlefield Earth
Yes, I actually enjoy what has been voted the worst movie of the last decade. I know how this looks. Anyone that has seen this movie can tell you that it’s probably one of the most incompetently made movies ever. ALL the shots of the movie are at a stupid angle, the pacing is crap, the tone shifts back and forth to the point it’s almost none existent, the plot make absolutely no sense and of course, it has some of the worst acting ever. Now, most of the other movies I’ve admitted to finding enjoyable, or just liking watching every once in awhile. Hell, even though I do have some enjoyment for it, I don’t actually want to own a copy of “The Rock”. This one though, I do want to own. I love this movie. Yes, I said it. This is my favorite movie that does absolutely everything wrong and I think it’s probably one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen. That’s why I like it. I don’t think it’s some over bashed secret gem or some subtle commentary on society or whatever. I think it’s the most unintentionally funny thing ever made. I hated it the first time I saw it, but on a second viewing I couldn’t stop laughing. Once you get over the shock of how terrible the actual film making behind it is, it is just a ton of fun. There are bad movies that really make you hate yourself for sitting through them, and then there are bad movies that just make you laugh. This is the one that makes me laugh the hardest. I know that there are going to be some people won’t be able to take me seriously after saying this, but I can’t lie, I really love this movie. It’s like all those sci fi movies that got made in the 50’s and 60’s. You know the ones, where some idiots that didn’t know what the hell they were doing took a camera up to Bronson Canyon to make a movie. It has some of the dumbest aliens you will ever see, the effects are lousy and you have such a great time making fun of it. I feel this is one of those rare films we’re sort of lucky to get like “The Room”. Like I said, it’s a movie that does absolutely everything wrong, and I think by its existence it’s a great example to NOT follow. I just can’t help it, from the moment it starts to the moment it ends, I am always on the floor laughing myself silly. And I am not going to apologize for finding something entertaining in this total train wreck of a movie.
10. Roger Corman Movies.
I’m kind of cheating with this one. Anyone that is a big enough movie fan or just a big fan of cheesy B movies, has at least heard of Roger Corman. Corman is a director and producer that is famous for two big things: 1. Without him, people like Martin Scorsese, Joe Dante, and James Cameron would probably not have jobs right now, and 2. Being notoriously cheap and producing as many movies as he can, sometimes within a single production. Corman has famously done things like shoot 3 or 4 movies on a single set at the same time, re-cycle props and costumes, and even shoot ENTIRE MOVIES IN A DAY! (allegedly) And the results, well, they can be down right idiotic or oddly good. But they are always, ALWAYS entertaining. Hell, one of his most famous movies, “The Little Shop Of Horrors” has been turned into a Broadway Musical and then THAT was adapted into a movie Musical starring Steve Martin and Rick Moranis! I can’t really pin point one movie that he’s specifically directed or produced that I feel could just represent the whole spectrum of his work, so I’m lumping them all together and will just list off some that I feel are especially memorable.
- Humanoids From The Deep
- The Edgar Allen Poe Adaptations starring Vincent Price.
- A Bucket of Blood
- Piranha (1979)
And
- It Conquered The World
Check these flicks out and enjoy!
9. Commando
Ok, this one probably isn’t much of a surprise seeing as how I have an already confessed fondness for the occasional big dumb action movie, it’s why I had “Machete” on my list of the five most enjoyable movies of 2010. But if I had to pick a favorite, it’d have to be “Commando”. Why isn’t this higher on the list then? It’s pretty much everyone’s favorite big dumb action movie. Schwarzeneggar has never had much in the way of acting chops, but that’s part of his charm if you ask me. No one delivers one liners better than Ah-nuld and in certain roles like the Terminator movies, his stilted delivery actually works really well for the character. But anyway “Commando”, if you have to ask me why I like the movie, you clearly haven’t seen it. The action is absolutely silly and over the top, the premise is paper thin and un-godly stupid, and the one liners are just pure gold. My personal favorite? “Remembah Sully when I said I’d kill you last?… I lied.” This is silly 80’s action schlock at its absolute finest. I have no problems saying that it is impossible for this movie not to bring some enjoyment. If you haven’t seen it yet, invite your friends over, grab some beer and pop corn and have a good time.
8. The Tingler
William Castle’s career really makes me hate modern movie marketing. It’s all straight forward about being a movie and that you should see it for excess CGI (Clash of the Titans 2010) or these two big name, gorgeous actors are in a movie together for the first time (The Tourist). No, William Castle was awesome. And I’m so sad that his style of publicity for movies stopped before my time. Like Roger Corman, he would release mostly B movie schlock like “House on Haunted Hill” and things of that ilk. However, Castle made a huge spectacle of these movies, creating marketing gimmicks that just made the movie going public have to go see them. Things like insisting audiences sign liability wavers saying they wouldn’t sue the theaters or studio due to the harshly terrifying nature of the movie, when in reality it was mostly silly and had effects only slightly better than the average Ed Wood movie. But the best gimmick had to be what he came up with for “The Tingler”, a Vincent Price vehicle that is about, and this is seriously the plot, a parasite that lives in your spine and feeds on your fear, causing a “tingling” sensation and can only be defeated by screaming to release all the feelings of fear and stop the nourishment of the creature. That premise is so freaking silly and yet so genius in its ridiculousness that it is completely awesome. Price really works to sell it as something serious, and honestly if he can’t that no one can, but for me the crowning moment of the movie is a scene where one Tingler that they have removed from a dead body, gets loose in a theater and the film cuts out with Vincent Price’s voice demanding that the audience “SCREAM! SCREAM FOR YOUR LIFE!”. When released in theaters, Castle had certain theaters install seats that would vibrate when this part occurred in the movie, hopefully causing the occupant to be caught off guard and let out a shriek that would cause the whole theater to scream. That, that is just plain awesome. However, since this can’t exactly be replicated at home on video, the scene is just left in as is… and it’s hilarious. This movie is just a great time and cheesy as a plate of nachos, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
7. Godzilla: Final Wars.
Yeah, I love Godzilla. I almost don’t want to call this a guilty pleasure, I feel that most of the films in the long running Japanese franchise are actually pretty damn good. Buuut most of the time I bring up my love of these films, some one always points out how silly they are, or how formulaic they get, and of course, how it’s a guy in a suit and that’s just stupid. Well you know what? I. Do. Not. CARE! I love my cheesy Japanese monster movies and I love them best when they feature guys in costumes beating the crap out of each other! The whole point is that you sit back and just accept them for what they are, fun. And hell, in the Heisei series (aka the run of the films from “Godzilla 1985” to “Godzilla Vs. Destoroyah”) the effects hold up really well and I would even say look better than more than half of the putrid CGI abominations that get released today. Plus, when you suspend your disbelief, these movies are far far more entertaining than the total crap Michael Bay releases on a regular basis. Hell, the first one is seen as a full on classic by many respected film critics. So again, I love my giant radioactive lizard that routinely destroys Tokyo while fighting other giant monsters, and if there was one movie they made with the big guy that I just adored for the sheer fun of it, it would have to be “Godzilla: Final Wars”, to date the last film in the Godzilla franchise. This movie is just awesome. It has: Giant monster battles. Kung Fu fighting. Car chases. Space ship fights. Aliens pretending to be humans. Tons of city destruction. Dark humor. Silly humor, and of course… Godzilla taking on more monsters than I’ve ever seen in a single movie. Yes, it is silly. Yes, it is cheesy. And yes, I don’t care what you think of me. I say we need more movies with guys in monster costumes fighting each other.
6. Yor: Hunter From The Future
Ok, I’ll be honest. I had never even heard of this movie until about a year ago when I saw a video review of it. It looked silly and I figured it’d be worth a laugh. Oh man was I right. Trying to describe this movie is nearly impossible, ok that’s not quite true. It’s a basic Conan knock off with some poorly designed Dinosaurs, ridiculous make up, and by far some of the most over the top performances ever. But in some weird way, this movie just works. It’s fun. I especially love the last third of the movie where Yor and friends go to the mysterious island populated by robots and a cliché bad guy called the Overlord. This guy’s dialogue is pure gold and super fun to imitate. It’s also of note for being one of the first starring roles for B list action hero Reb Brown. I can’t explain why but there is something that makes this movie just bad enough that it’s cheesy and silly in a good way. From the moment the silly theme song starts, to the moment it sends us out with the end credits, this movie is just pure fun. I’m a little bothered this movie hasn’t had a DVD release in the states yet, but if you look really hard, you can find a VHS copy like I did. I own this movie and always love watching it when I’m in that mood for something epic in that special kind of way.
5. Tales From The Crypt: Demon Knight
Here’s where things are going to get embarrassing. While I still defend my love of these movies, they are the ones that I know I probably shouldn’t like nearly as much as I do. This of course wasn’t the first time the Tales from the Crypt franchise went to the movies, (I may save those for a later day.) This was the first time that the modern TV show took it’s style to the big screen. How did they choose to do it? With a horror anthology? Ummm…. No, they went with an “Army Of Darkness” rip off. However I will confess that this movie always makes me laugh but feel guilty at the same time. Why’s that? Well, I like it for one big reason, it’s insanely immature, a criticism I’ve held against many other movies I’ve reviewed most notably “Gamer”. So yes, liking this makes me feel a little hypocritical, but in my defense, this is a movie that doesn’t really try and present itself as something other than aggressively juvenile and I love it for that. The problem I have with things like “Gamer” is well, it feels stupid to try and have a movie that is trying, I guess, to be taken seriously, and then turn around and show boobs for the sake of being able to. This movie, it feels like the excess is part of the fun. Hell, to be honest, I enjoyed the “Crank” movies for the same reason and they had the same creative team as “Gamer”. This movie is just fun. Peoples’ heads get punched through, there are gratuitous bare breasts, insanely over the top gore, corny puns and of course the Crypt keeper making bad jokes at the front and end of the movie. Not even touching the absolutely awesome turn Billy Zane takes as the lead demon. Really I just always have a great time with this movie and know that I shouldn’t, but all the same, it’s earned it’s rightful place on my DVD shelf.
4. Resident Evil: Apocalypse
I’ve said before that I like the first two Resident Evil movies, but I dislike the last two. I gave a little bit of a reason when I talked about “Afterlife” but I’ll elaborate a little further. I love the fact that these first two movies are insanely bad. No really, I never played the games or anything, I like these movies because they are stupid mindless fun and I have a great time making fun of them while watching them MST3K style. The problem I have with “Extinction” and “Afterlife” is that they are really, really boring. “Extinction” is a movie that seems to be trying to ape “Day of the Dead” and “The Road Warrior” at the same time, to a resoundingly uninteresting effect. And “afterlife” is a gimmicky piece of crap that tries to stretch at best 30 or so minutes of plot over an hour and half. The first two though, oh boy, these are some of the most interestingly bad things I’ve ever seen. I actually went to see this one twice opening weekend because I just had a great time laughing at it. It’s so stupid and wants to present itself as a serious adaptation of the video games from what I’ve seen, and I just can’t stop laughing at it. The performances are just terrible, but the action is interesting. The monsters are laughable, and made even more so by the fact people are trying to take it seriously in the movie. I honestly can’t really understand why people have such a problem with this one, aside from being a poor adaptation of the video game it’s based on. I don’t feel it’s all that bad if you just want a fun movie, but I’m quite the minority here so it makes number four purely because I seem to be one of the only people that likes it in any fashion.
3. Freddy versus Jason
Yeah, I don’t think I need to explain why I feel guilty about this one. But to be honest, I really don’t think this is that bad. In general movies that have matched up two completely different franchises have, well, sucked. You only need to look at “AVP” to know that. This one, I didn’t think was that bad. I watched it during a phase where I had seen all the “Nightmare on Elm Street” movies and had just finished slogging through the “Friday the 13th” movies. So naturally I figured I may as well sit down for the team up and I fully expected to hate it. Before you ask, I’ll take Freddy over Jason. Sorry to those fans of Mr. Voorhees, but I honestly don’t like him or his movies all that much. So yeah, I was rooting for Freddy the whole time. Yeah, the movie has a cop out ending, which is unfortunate, but I rather like how creative they got with the plot to bring these two together, and the fight scenes with the two of them are just great. The movie seems to know that it’s not supposed to be a serious horror film and I respect it for that. It’s a fun ride with great jokes, awesome kill scenes and a hook to ensure you’ll watch it from beginning to end.
2. The Rock
*Sigh* Yes. Yes, I know. I know how this looks. I am truly sorry for doing this, but I promised I’d be honest here. *Gulp* There is in fact ONE and only ONE Michael Bay movie that I like, “The Rock” starring Nicolas Cage and Sean Connery. And that’s actually why I like the movie right there: Nicolas Cage and Sean Connery, trying to one up each other in a silly action movie. It’s just golden. Everything else about the movie sucks. The story is stock action fodder, the actions scene are, eh, I guess competent seeing as this was before Bay really liked his shaky camera stuff we’ve sooooooo loved from the “Transformers” movies. In fact, if you had two other actors in these roles, I would say this movie was totally worthless. But it’s saved by Connery playing the gruff aging bad ass and Nic Cage playing a quirky scientist. They have the funniest acting exchanges I’ve seen in a movie and when I try and look back at what’s memorable about this movie, it is things like Cage doing weird face ticks and holding a gun shakily, or Connery saying: “Your best? Losers always whine about their best. Winners get to go home and fuck the prom queen.” I just can’t help it. Dumb crap like that makes me laugh and I think that it saves an otherwise terrible movie just by giving it that massive amount of entertainment value, intentional are not. This movie is here at number 2 because it’s a movie I admit I can’t fully hate, from a director I despise on every level.
So you’re probably asking. What could possibly make you feel more guilty than admitting to liking Michael Bay? How could you possibly top that? What could possibly be worse?
Well, since you asked… Here it goes.
1. Battlefield Earth
Yes, I actually enjoy what has been voted the worst movie of the last decade. I know how this looks. Anyone that has seen this movie can tell you that it’s probably one of the most incompetently made movies ever. ALL the shots of the movie are at a stupid angle, the pacing is crap, the tone shifts back and forth to the point it’s almost none existent, the plot make absolutely no sense and of course, it has some of the worst acting ever. Now, most of the other movies I’ve admitted to finding enjoyable, or just liking watching every once in awhile. Hell, even though I do have some enjoyment for it, I don’t actually want to own a copy of “The Rock”. This one though, I do want to own. I love this movie. Yes, I said it. This is my favorite movie that does absolutely everything wrong and I think it’s probably one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen. That’s why I like it. I don’t think it’s some over bashed secret gem or some subtle commentary on society or whatever. I think it’s the most unintentionally funny thing ever made. I hated it the first time I saw it, but on a second viewing I couldn’t stop laughing. Once you get over the shock of how terrible the actual film making behind it is, it is just a ton of fun. There are bad movies that really make you hate yourself for sitting through them, and then there are bad movies that just make you laugh. This is the one that makes me laugh the hardest. I know that there are going to be some people won’t be able to take me seriously after saying this, but I can’t lie, I really love this movie. It’s like all those sci fi movies that got made in the 50’s and 60’s. You know the ones, where some idiots that didn’t know what the hell they were doing took a camera up to Bronson Canyon to make a movie. It has some of the dumbest aliens you will ever see, the effects are lousy and you have such a great time making fun of it. I feel this is one of those rare films we’re sort of lucky to get like “The Room”. Like I said, it’s a movie that does absolutely everything wrong, and I think by its existence it’s a great example to NOT follow. I just can’t help it, from the moment it starts to the moment it ends, I am always on the floor laughing myself silly. And I am not going to apologize for finding something entertaining in this total train wreck of a movie.
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